JNZJNY....

It finally came today. I ordered by personalized breast cancer awareness plates a few weeks ago and have been anxiously awaiting their arrival! I always heard that once you are diagnosed with breast cancer you are immediately a member of this "sisterhood". I never really understood that until my turn came to be a member. It is the most amazing feeling. A feeling of "never being alone". Now I have the plates on my car telling the world that I am a member of that sisterhood.

I have been feeling really good for the last week or so. Good enough to go on the elk hunt with my boys. If you ask my mom, she will tell you that I over did it. It did pretty much wear me out, but it meant a lot to spend that time with "my boys". Jake was able to get his first elk "in honor of his mom." I will be posting those pics on the family blog as soon as John gets home with the camera. I'm trying not to think about Monday. Treatment number 3. I am determined to make the most out of the last few days until then.

Four to go.....

Now I really know why people call this a "battle". You don't really feel it until you are fighting it yourself. With football in full swing, it hit me.....I'm fighting a long, strategic, battle...that I will win. Why? Because I have the best play book in the league. His Word!! No secrets. No amazing will power, just the good old Heavenly Father, who is holding me in His arms right now saying...We got this Jen!!

When I was sitting in the "beautiful, brown, vinyl, chemo chair" this afternoon getting poked with needles. My beautifully supportive husband could sense the anxiety coming over me. He looked up at those IV bags full of the poison that would soon be running through my veins, and just started thanking and praising God for this healing medicine that is keeping me alive to watch my kids grow up and my grandkids. That was just what I needed to hear. He is the most awesome man that I could ever ask for. Thank you God for giving me the exact weapons I need to walk this journey. I know that none of it was an accident, from me falling in love with this man 17 years ago...the the neighbors that you have put in my life...to the developing of my love for photography...to the most awesome family anyone could ever ask for!!!!

Journey on.....

Peace in Jesus...

"These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world." John 16:33

God never promised us a life without trials and challenges. Who am I to feel sorry for myself because I am experiencing one now? This is what He has called me to walk through today at this very hour. I will do it with all the grace and faith that He will give me.

Please pray that this round will be a little easier. Just no complications. Thank you for healing me.....

New beginnings....

The day finally came. My scalp was getting really sore. It felt like a bad sunburn. I decided that I didn't want to wait to find my hair laying on my pillow or in the shower. I wanted to have control over when and where it came out. I was ready today. Jackson, John and Jadyn were right there cheering me on. Jackson actually did his first. Then, it was my turn. I'm not going to try and act like it was easy. Because it wasn't. It was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. But, it actually feels really liberating now. It's the last old thing to come off that the cancer was attached to. Now it is nothing but new beginnings.

the beginning......

Well, this might rank up there with the wierdest post I have done so far. But, it's all part of the process and I told myself I was going to share everything from beginning to the end of this long journey. I am feeling stronger every day. That is definitely a plus. I guess I need to take about 10 days to get myself back. It's good to be back. My friend Annie actually took me out of the house today for something besides a dr.'s appointment. That was fun! Thanks Annie.

If you would have told me 6 months ago that I would be crying today over losing my nose hair!!..I would have told you that you're crazy!!! But, I did. I guess this is the beginning of the end of my hair. I know it sounds silly, but it really is traumatic! (along with a little painful!) I just needed to call my sis and cry for a few minutes and then I'm over it. My scalp is feeling a little tingly. Some say that is the first sign of the hair falling out. I think we might be having a girl's night and just shave it off in a few days. That way I am still feeling somewhat in control! We all know I like that!

Anyway, that was my big drama for the day....along with dealing with some mouth sores. That's nothing I can't handle. I go tomorrow for a blood count to make sure I can get my next treatment. Pray for all to be well. Love you all.....till next time. You can thank me later for not posting any pictures of my "hairless nose" :)